


P is for Please

by Xenobotanist



Series: Garashir Garashorts [5]
Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Abuse of Alliteration, Dialogue-Only, M/M, Wordplay, dorks being dorky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:21:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28143036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xenobotanist/pseuds/Xenobotanist
Summary: Garak and Julian get distracted from their debate and go on a tangent.
Relationships: Julian Bashir & Elim Garak, Julian Bashir/Elim Garak
Series: Garashir Garashorts [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1896124
Comments: 9
Kudos: 47





	P is for Please

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know. Don't ask me.

“Doctor, if you could use one word to describe Cardassians, what would it be?”

“Punctual.”

“Out of all our traits, you chose that?”

“Hmm. You’re right. You do like to be on time, but it’s not your defining characteristic. For that, I’d have to say… Picky. Or maybe Particular.”

“Well, we do like things to be a certain way. But no other words come to mind?”

“Practical? Painfully pragmatic?”

“I’m beginning to think you’re not taking my question seriously.”

“Oh wait, I know! I was thinking about Dukat, and I came up with the perfect term:  _ pontificating _ .”

“Yes, he does love the sound of his own voice, doesn’t he?”

“Sounds like someone else I know.”

“I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“What about  _ precise _ ? I do remember you saying that your people pay close attention to detail.”

“Ah yes, I did say that, didn’t I? But I feel like our conversation has gotten slightly off track.”

“But I have so many more good words! These two describe Cardassians to the T: Proud and patriotic.”

“Those actually are very apt.”

“Oh, right. And  _ patronizing.” _

“I really was agreeing with you, my dear. Just because I concur with something you say doesn’t mean I’m humoring you.”

“So glad to know. Now, I  _ can _ tell you a few words that describe my favorite Cardassian.”

“Can you? Go on, then.”

“He’s passionate. About many things. And persuasive, too. Even poetic at times. And just a tiny bit possessive.”

“Sounds admirable.”

“Don’t you mean praiseworthy?”

“My, you’re quite persistent, aren’t you?”

“That’s the spirit! Feeling a little playful now?”

“Puzzled, more like. What is this sudden preoccupation with profligate use of prose? Have you, perchance, suffered a pound or pummel to the pericranium?”

“Preposterous! I’m the picture of perfect--um, wait, let me think…”

“You seem to have pitched your way into a predicament.”

“Yes, running out of phrases can be problematic. I might be prone to plunging my way into prickly positions.”

“Quite predictably.”

“Hey, no need to be petty. But pray tell, might I petition you for your perspective on something?”

“Presumably.”

“How long do you think we can perform this pursuit?”

“If you permit me to peek at the thesaurus on my padd, at least another twenty minutes.”

“That sounds passable, seeing as Standard isn’t your primary language.” 

“How permissive of you. I promise not to abuse the privilege.” 

“Except now I can’t ponder a single premise to parley over.” 

“Indeed, the pressure to prevail has cast a pall over our proceedings.” 

“It all seemed so provocative at first. But now I feel as if my pleasure has been slightly punctured.”

“You can’t be postulating that all pertinent phrases have already been presented.”

“I’m positive that if this were for points, you’d have first prize.”

“Possibly. But as a practiced physician, there must be plenty of physiological parts to pick from.”

“You’re right! Pupils, palms, pelvis, pancreas…”

“Doctor, you can’t just parade out a pile of terms. That isn’t proper.”

“Bugger, this could be painstaking. Ah, um, my palms are perspiring at my paltry preparedness.” 

“Indeed, I can perceive the change in your pupils and the pink in your cheeks.” 

“Is it at least pretty, my plain and simple partner?”

“Purely prepossessing.”

“Your own patterned ridges  _ have  _ become more prominent; their color is nearly periwinkle.”

“Perhaps we should proceed to somewhere with more… privacy.”

“I wouldn’t protest. Your place, or mine?”

“Do you have a preference?”

“I suppose it depends on what our plan is to pass the time.”

“I propose pausing the game in favor of something more pleasant.”

“In that case… my possessions aren’t pristine, but the furniture is plush.”

“I believe you have persuaded me. And yet you persist playing.”

“As do you. Perplexing. Shall we progress to my property?”

“Yes. Please.”

**Author's Note:**

> ...And then they Spaceflix and chill. Holoflix and chill? I really want to come up with a 24th century term for that.
> 
> So, my brain has been all over this week. I'm having something of a manic episode, only a lot less focused than usual, so I've started 5 stories but this is the only one I've "finished." Blech. But I haven't written anything 'G' in a while, so at least I can cross that off my list.


End file.
